The season in life where I thought "Maybe I just don't want a relationship" | Ep 132

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There was a moment about five years ago, around age 34, where I thought to myself: Maybe I just don't want a relationship.

Clients will say a similar thing to me, often using language like: I'm not even sure I want to be in a relationship.

In today's episode I'm exploring what rests beneath those words (what they meant for me, what they mean for others) and what it means to intellectualize our pain. I specifically discuss:

  • How a debilitating breakup made me never want to try to have a relationship again

  • How I very much wanted a partner and a family but struggled so deeply to believe I'd ever have those things, that it made it easier to tell myself I didn't want them

  • How and why we intellectualizing our pain

  • How focusing on being grateful can serve as a mask to what we want to change in our lives

  • What's involved in letting our deep longings and desires breathe

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This is where the feeling "I'm never going to meet someone" comes from | Ep 131