EP 80 | On not getting asked to the dance + how it's showing up in your love life now

Listen on Spotify | Listen on Apple Podcasts

Oooooh adolesence. YEESH. I was recently binging "The Summer I Turned Pretty," and it was giving me all the feels. Namely because. I never had a summer I turned pretty! I just stayed....staying in the identity of being the girl that didn't have the boyfriend, didn't get asked out, wasn't the pretty girl.

I know I'm not alone in this. Client after client tells me of tender stories from middle and high school years of never feeling like the pretty girl, knowing they weren't going to be the ones to be asked out, focusing heavily on their schoolwork and performance in order to individuate, etc etc.

The thing is, those identities that do and don't get formed, can have a significant effect on our dating and relationship patterns and trajectories. In short, the stories are still playing out. It can often be the why behind:

  • No matches

  • Never deeply connecting with anyone

  • Experiencing tremendous anxiety around dating

  • Fearing you'll never meet someone

If you relate to that young identity and you're not facing obstacles in your dating and relationship life, today's episode is going to be SO clarifying. In it we'll cover:

  • How these ways we learn to relate to ourselves and the world (at such an impressionable age) have reverberating effects on our future romantic life

  • How actually then receiving love and praise can land as quite threatening and uncomfortable

  • How these beliefs we hold about ourselves serve as an invisible barrier to attracting the person we want to meet

  • How we can go about reversing these ways we view ourselves and start to create comfort, familiarity and safety in adoration, love and praise

NEW! Work with me on your career transition. 

Take My Online Course
Work with me Privately
Connect on Instagram
Website
Podcast Production by James Jorge


Previous
Previous

EP 81 | Why it's so damn hard to build confidence + self trust in dating, relationships + sex (and how we actually go about doing it)

Next
Next

EP 79 | This is how I coach my clients to use the dating apps + what does and doesn't matter