Episode 28: On being the martyr in my own relationship.
I have a story, and it goes like this:
I have to do everything on my own.
In this episode I'm joined by my fiancé James to discuss my long held tendency to play the martyr in my relationship. The traditional definition of a martyr is someone who victimizes themselves for the benefit of others.
But in the context of romantic relationships it can look like:
Overextending yourself (i.e. by what you do for the other person) as a means to maintain control
A deep rooted undeserving-ness that manifests as playing the caretaker role with your partner to make yourself feel needed
The resentment and pain that then builds by operating in this way
We talk about what this looks like in my relationship with James, as well as how this behavior shows up for James in areas outside of his life outside of our relationship.
Here is the first episode I did with James.
https://www.ithinkilikeyou.co/